Friday, April 29, 2011

Everybody has a story

I often sit and think how everybody has a story. Every person has something that has dramatically influenced their lives. I have been so blessed to have the opportunity to speak with so many women who volunteer to tell their stories to me. Their stories that include loss of a precious child, loss of their hopes and dreams. These are people who have volunteered to speak with my and try to help me through my time of need. Revisiting thier own loss is not easy and that is what makes what they do so special. It is amazing how large the community of grieving parents is and even more amazing is how open greiving parents are to share their stories. When you lose a child it is as if you become part of a group that you never wanted to be a part of. I wish that nobody had to ever be part of such a group. The common thread that I hear is that even though you live your life, you will never forget. But eventually the remembering is not accompanied with pain, but instead with love and thankfulness. I will eventually get to the point when I can be thankful and not angry. When I get to that point I hope to be able to give back by being there for any other parent that has suffered the loss of a child. It the perfect world, this type of tragety will bever happen again. In reality, this type of tragety happens everyday. I miss you Isabella.


Chris M said...

Great post Marisa.

When you finally pass through the hardest part, I know you'll be a source of strength for many others going through the same pain. I know you'll be good at it.

This is another way Bella's legacy of love will live on.


Patricia said...

Hi Marisa,

I'm feeling really guilty right now because this is the first week I haven't visited you. The last time I saw you was Saturday and even then, it was very brief. I feel guilty because as you said in your earlier post, our lives have moved on, even though we still think of you and Frank and Isabella, our lives have in a sense, have 'returned to normal' while you are still going through so much pain. Every time I come home and see your house, I look up at your window to see if the shutters are drawn or open. For some reason if they're open, I think maybe it hasn't been too bad of a day. I don't want you to think I've abandoned you and will be there for you less and less as time goes on. I want the opposite to be true. I want to be there for you as much as I can. It's a funny thing actually, whenever I come over to see you and Frank, it's actually you guys that lift me up. John and I were talking about this the other night, how there's such a positive energy around you and your kindness towards each other and to others just fills us with such warmth. I can see it in John after he comes home from visiting with you. He's so touched by the both of you. I hope you are up for a visit from me tonight and I would love to meditate together again.

Lucy said...

Knowing, loving and losing Bella has taught me many life lessons. How you have dealt with this difficult situation and find strength each day continues to teach many of us important lessons each day. You don't even realize that you, Frank and Sweet Bella have already given back in so many ways and I know in time you will find even more ways to help others. Isabella is an amazing little girl and it's no wonder since she has you as a Mom.

Anonymous said...

Marisa, I've been saying that for awhile too. It's pretty amazing how many people have a story. It's like people are coming out of the woodwork to share what has happened to them. It's not comforting to hear of another person's loss, but it does make you realize that you are not the first and unfortunately not the last to exerperience this and that you are NOT ALONE. I think of you often and am truly amazed how your daughter continues to bring you so much strength. I never met Isabella, but I can tell she is an incredible sweet angel. May God and Bella continue to give you & your family strength.