Monday, May 9, 2011

My Mother's Day visit

Mother's Day has come and gone and I am still standing. Mother's Day was not acknowledged in my house as per my request, even though, I am a mother to a beautiful little girl Isabella. I could not wrap my head around celebrating this day without her. I have to say that MD was not any harder then any other day. I still woke up knowing that she was not there and went through the day trying to fill the time. The only thing that was different was that I could tell you exactly what I was doing last year on that day. I was out for brunch with my husband, Bella, my mother and father and my sister who was pregnant at the time and her husband. Reliving that fantastic memory is what made it hard.

While I was pregnant with Isabella, she kicked the first time on Mothers Day. She made that day so special with one little kick. I knew that she would come to me in my dream that MD morning because she knows that is was a special day. I woke up at 8:00am on MD and was sad that she had not visited me, so I went downstairs to lie on the couch. I fell back asleep and then it happened, she came for a visit. I dreamt that I went into her room and she was in her crib. I picked her up and knowing that she was not here to stay I held her tight. We rocked on the rocking chair and I loved every second of it. She slept on my lap as she always did and I ran my hands through her hair. I got to do what I miss most, which is hold her tight. That was the best Mother's Day gift that I could have ever received. Isabella always knows what I need and that is a gift that she received from above. For a little child she had the wisdom and compassion of an angel.


michelle said...

Thank you for your comment, it helps. I am trying hard to get to the place where I accept Jacks passing but its been a very slow process for me full of emotion and conflicted feelings. I seem to jump all over the place in the stages of grief but yet I dont get to the end stage, maybe I never will. Your daughter is beautiful. I love that hair - so dark with porcelin skin. She is a gorgeous angel.

Natalie Turowski said...

I'm so glad you got to see her and hold her. You're still a mother and Bella gave you the best present.

Love Nat

Mary said...

What a blessing! She is such a sweet girl to come visit her mommy on a special day. I think it is so special that you can make new memories with her through your dreams. Your baby girl is so beautiful! Thank you for sharing her with us.

Patricia said...

Oh my gosh Marisa, that is so unbelievably beautiful and touching, I can't stop crying as I read this.