Thursday, August 22, 2013

Dear Isabella

Dear Isabella, I want to apologize if you think that I don't think of you as much a I used to. Nothing could be further from the truth. You are always on my mind and in my heart. I am sorry if I do not pray to you as much as I used to or go to the cemetery enough. I feel like my life is moving forward so fast and I am finding it hard to keep up. Your little brother has brought so much joy back to my life and for that I am so thankful. It brings back so many memories of our precious time together. Today when we went for a walk the o e thing that he wanted to hold in his hand the entire time was a blue striped sock. I remember your love for socks and how you would put them under your legs, pull them out, then repeat! From a distance or for the spectator looking in it may look like I am complete once again. I must because I fi d myself laughing, I attend functions, I am running once again. The truth is that I do laugh and often I am laughing at a silly memory of you. My life is moving forward it I am not complete. There will always be a piece of my heart and an important member of our family that is missed. In an earlier post I described it as being similar to losing a limb. You eventually learn to go on without that limb but always know that the limb is missing I want you to know that today I am happy. I have found joy and love again. This is not the destiny that I wanted,that I chose but it is the one that the u inverse felt I needed. I have fi ally arrived at acceptance a d it is a good place to be. I love you so much Isabella and I k ow that you love me. Your brother and your daddy have that special relationship that you and I share. BEST FRIENDS FOREVER! Keep lighting up heaven just as you did here on earth. Miss you always, Mommy


Susan said...

Glad you are finding some happiness Marisa - I think the joy does come back into your life, when in the early days that seemed unatainable. However still so much is hard - I do think we will continue to improve and cope better.

Take care, susan xx

Anonymous said...

This is exactly how Isabella wants to see her mommy on earth. Happy and on the run.
Gina xoxoxo

Lucy said...

Sis, you continue to amaze me and inspire me to be strong while on this rollercoaster ride we call LIFE.